As I attach myself more to the Qur’an, I realize the process begins with the heart. Hence, I learn iman is found in the heart. What is that manifestation of my iman, I have found out from this verse of the Qur’an.
إِنَّمَا الْمُؤْمِنُونَ الَّذِينَ إِذَا ذُكِرَ اللَّـهُ وَجِلَتْ قُلُوبُهُمْ وَإِذَا تُلِيَتْ عَلَيْهِمْ آيَاتُهُ زَادَتْهُمْ إِيمَانًا وَعَلَىٰ رَبِّهِمْ يَتَوَكَّلُونَ ﴿٢﴾۔
“The believers are only those who, when Allah is mentioned, their hearts become fearful, and when His verses are recited to them, it increases them in faith; and upon their Lord they rely.”
What is the condition of my heart as I understand this verse of the Qur’an?
A condition of the Believers is given. They are the ones whose hearts become fearful when Allah (SWT) is mentioned and the verses of the Qur’an are recited to them. The result of these two actions on the hearts it that it fills up with iman.
I analyze myself: Does my heart tremble and when does it tremble?
- The heart trembles when the torment of fire is mentioned.
- The heart trembles when Jannah is mentioned.
- The heart trembles when I see myself more blessed than many.
- The heart trembles when Allah (SWT) takes me out of calamity.
- The heart trembles when my children lie to me, deviate or do not pray on time.
- The heart trembles when I reflect on my sins and not been taken into account.
- The heart trembles more when Mercy of Allah (SWT) is mentioned.
- The heart trembles when I see clear miracles of Allah (SWT) around.
A good recitation catches my attraction and I love to recite the Qur’an too. My heart is mesmerized, freshens, softens, cries, fear and thanks the Rabb listening to these ayahs. I feel my iman at its peak!
But then the state of heart (قلب ) keeps on changing; I tend to stumble. Yet, I have hope in the mercy of Allah (SWT). And my iman rises again as I reconnect with Him.
I make du’a:
اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي عَبْدُكَ، وَابْنُ عَبْدِكَ، وَابْنُ أَمَتِكَ، نَاصِيَتِي بِيَدِكَ، مَاضٍ فِيَّ حُكْمُكَ، عَدْلٌ فِيَّ قَضَاؤُكَ، أَسْأَلُكَ بِكُلِّ اسْمٍ هُوَ لَكَ، سَمَّيْتَ بِهِ نَفْسَكَ، أَوْ أَنْزَلْتَهُ فِي كِتَابِكَ، أَوْ عَلَّمْتَهُ أَحَداً مِنْ خَلْقِكَ، أَوِ اسْتَأْثَرْتَ بِهِ فِي عِلْمِ الغَيْبِ عِنْدَكَ، أَنْ تَجْعَلَ القُرْآنَ رَبِيعَ قَلْبِي، وَنُورَ صَدْرِي، وَجَلاَءَ حُزْنِي وَذَهَابَ هَمِّي
O Allah, verily I am Your servant, the daughter of Your servant, the daughter of your maid-servant. My forelock is in Your hands, Your command continuously prevails over me, Your Decree concerning me is just. I beseech You by every one of Your names: those which You use to refer to Yourself, or have revealed in Your book, or have taught to any one of Your creation, or have chosen to keep hidden with You in the unseen, to make the Qur’ān the springtime of my heart, the light of my chest, the dispelling of my grief, and the deportation of my anxiety